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> Love/Relationship thread, get/share advice here
RemieGino14
Posted: Nov 5 2008, 12:45 AM
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Out of everyone's response, I only have a few words to say.

"...I guess."

:P I get the fact to move on and learn from mistakes, funny thing was there I didn't make any mistakes, she was just being ignorant and well...neglecting? Oh wells.

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roxas3
Posted: Nov 5 2008, 03:42 PM
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Any first relationship is like that Remie. I'm surprised she's the ignorant one but then again, it just shows that there are many differing types of women out there...
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iKoN
Posted: Nov 5 2008, 05:51 PM
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they pursue me like a dream. thas y they dnt catch me
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QUOTE (Dare @ Nov 3 2008, 11:47 PM)
does it matter that she has a kid?

it shouldnt
xD

we'll it kinda does man u kno.. it'll b weird.. though the good side is that shes more mature and is not like every lil high school gurl..but idk, i'll see. ill post future updates lol
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roxas3
Posted: Nov 5 2008, 05:58 PM
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Yeah, keep us up to date buddy. Hopefully, you'll get to score one there :P
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gs68
Posted: Nov 7 2008, 02:03 AM
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I said I'd keep my love life (or lack thereof) a secret, but I might as well spill a couple failed experiences.

2 years ago, when I was 17, there was this girl from the golf team that I thought was pretty cute. Took a few months for me to tell her my feelings. I got rejected, but she left me with an encouraging message telling me not to give up on finding that special someone someday. It did kinda hurt, but at least I anticipated that she didn't like me back. If anything, this was nothing compared to what happened earlier this year.

What happened earlier this year, you ask? I came to like another girl--one from one of my classes. She was quite friendly to me, almost to a flirting extent. I enjoyed sitting next to her in class, at least for a while. So Valentine's Day comes around and I ask for her number. I text her that evening and she texts back, asking who I am (even though I clearly introduced myself in the text I sent her).

And then...I called her back the next day. She answered, and started talking to me, in a not-so-happy mood. I couldn't exactly make out what she was saying, but I knew it wasn't good. So I messaged her on Facebook asking her to clarify what she said, and what did she say? She says she only likes me as a friend. Okay. Standard rejection fare. But the next part of her message? She says that we should only talk to each other in class and not outside of class.

I was in shock. She only wants to contain whatever friendship we still have within class? I said not a word to her in class the next chance I saw her. It took me a month to recover emotionally.

I was not alone in love-related things going into epic fail territory though. My younger cousin in Pinole, who I hold much respect for, broke up with his girlfriend over her mom apparently finding out about something. He couldn't push himself to find out the truth. And then my other friend was in a bit of a panic over a long-distance relationship. I guess V-Day causes more broken hearts than united ones...or something like that.

That's all I have to say...for now.
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cmspaz
Posted: Nov 7 2008, 10:47 AM
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Yeah, class-only friendships are becoming increasingly common these days. It's pretty lame and sad.

Well, as long as we're sharing failures, I might as well post the most notable one I've got.

So, I mentioned being single for a few months now since the end of a 10 month relationship earlier, well, it was a fairly serious relationship, and there were multiple points throughout where we'd talked about solidifying it with something a little more tangible, gold, and shiny. Toward the end of the summer, we started fighting a lot, due to tons of stress in both of our lives (her busy internship, my failing out of engineering, and the death of my last remaining grandfather), and she decided to break up with me. When asked why, she initially gave a bunch of bullshit answers that didn't add up. Finally she admitted that it was because she didn't feel like it was worth it to put forth any sort of effort to try to fix things.

I was pretty much struck dumb... I could come up with 10 months of "worth it," and for someone who said that she had no regrets about the relationship, the fact that she was unwilling to put forth a single once of effort now, since she hadn't done so at any point previous didn't help.

I figured it all out later, though... she didn't really care all that much to begin with. I was pretty much being used.
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RB33
Posted: Nov 7 2008, 06:31 PM
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QUOTE (gs68 @ Today at 2:03 AM)
I said I'd keep my love life (or lack thereof) a secret, but I might as well spill a couple failed experiences.

2 years ago, when I was 17, there was this girl from the golf team that I thought was pretty cute. Took a few months for me to tell her my feelings. I got rejected, but she left me with an encouraging message telling me not to give up on finding that special someone someday. It did kinda hurt, but at least I anticipated that she didn't like me back. If anything, this was nothing compared to what happened earlier this year.

What happened earlier this year, you ask? I came to like another girl--one from one of my classes. She was quite friendly to me, almost to a flirting extent. I enjoyed sitting next to her in class, at least for a while. So Valentine's Day comes around and I ask for her number. I text her that evening and she texts back, asking who I am (even though I clearly introduced myself in the text I sent her).

And then...I called her back the next day. She answered, and started talking to me, in a not-so-happy mood. I couldn't exactly make out what she was saying, but I knew it wasn't good. So I messaged her on Facebook asking her to clarify what she said, and what did she say? She says she only likes me as a friend. Okay. Standard rejection fare. But the next part of her message? She says that we should only talk to each other in class and not outside of class.

I was in shock. She only wants to contain whatever friendship we still have within class? I said not a word to her in class the next chance I saw her. It took me a month to recover emotionally.

I was not alone in love-related things going into epic fail territory though. My younger cousin in Pinole, who I hold much respect for, broke up with his girlfriend over her mom apparently finding out about something. He couldn't push himself to find out the truth. And then my other friend was in a bit of a panic over a long-distance relationship. I guess V-Day causes more broken hearts than united ones...or something like that.

That's all I have to say...for now.

Everyone also goes through that sort of situation at least once in their life. Relax bro, it maybe because the girl has other priorities, such as focusing on her studies among others, that's why she said that she only wants to talk to you during class. On the flipside, at least she was honest about how she feels and that she didn't give you any false hope or use you...

@cmspaz
OUCH... I feel your pain...
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roxas3
Posted: Nov 7 2008, 06:45 PM
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@cmspaz...that actually really sucks. I can admit the stuff you said did strain the relationship but breaking up because she's CBF'ed to fix the problem is just low. And I'm betting she'll be like that whenever stress/shit hits the fan...
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gs68
Posted: Nov 7 2008, 07:15 PM
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QUOTE (RB33 @ Today at 6:31 PM)
Everyone also goes through that sort of situation at least once in their life. Relax bro, it maybe because the girl has other priorities, such as focusing on her studies among others, that's why she said that she only wants to talk to you during class. On the flipside, at least she was honest about how she feels and that she didn't give you any false hope or use you...

@cmspaz
OUCH... I feel your pain...

Thanks.
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cmspaz
Posted: Nov 7 2008, 08:25 PM
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Thanks guys.

I'm perfectly fine and over her now (and rightfully so), I'd be pretty pathetic if I weren't... But unfortunately that doesn't remove the regret, it doesn't refund my bank account, and it doesn't give me back my time or my v-card. It's a live and learn thing, and I'm not going to let it happen again, that's for sure.
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Yoshida Seiji
Posted: Nov 10 2008, 08:04 AM
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While I'm young. I've been in this relationship for quite a while. We've more or less lived together for about three years.

She's put up with all of my bullshit. Which is more than I could say about my past girlfriends. :lol: We're both feeling pretty ready to take it to the next level. But that's just in the planning stages now. Since we both have a new baby coming along (My new AE86 XD) we figured we'd both throw our funds into it, despite her hating the car.

At any rate. She supports me through all of my stupid stuff. I support her fashion obsession. It's a give and take kinda thing. :lol:

In all seriousness though. I understand what kind of step this is in my life. That's why it wasn't just an over night choice we've been talking about it long and hard for about a year or so.
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westslidestory
Posted: Nov 10 2008, 10:26 AM
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QUOTE (Yoshida Seiji @ Today at 8:04 AM)
While I'm young. I've been in this relationship for quite a while. We've more or less lived together for about three years.

She's put up with all of my bullshit. Which is more than I could say about my past girlfriends. :lol: We're both feeling pretty ready to take it to the next level. But that's just in the planning stages now. Since we both have a new baby coming along (My new AE86 XD) we figured we'd both throw our funds into it, despite her hating the car.

At any rate. She supports me through all of my stupid stuff. I support her fashion obsession. It's a give and take kinda thing. :lol:

In all seriousness though. I understand what kind of step this is in my life. That's why it wasn't just an over night choice we've been talking about it long and hard for about a year or so.

sounds good dude. Hopefully it works out for you.

Me and my ex wife fixed our s13s together, then progressed to bigger cars.. hehe it twas a learning experience
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cmspaz
Posted: Nov 10 2008, 11:11 AM
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Sounds familiar.

The car is more important than the girl. Period. The car isn't going to take everything you own if you beat on it.
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fuji*
Posted: Nov 10 2008, 09:32 PM
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QUOTE (cmspaz @ Today at 12:11 PM)
Sounds familiar.

The car is more important than the girl. Period. The car isn't going to take everything you own if you beat on it.

Lol. That's true, but remember, how would our racing gene's go any further in our life time without a girl by your side? I wish i had a nice girlfriend =_=.
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cmspaz
Posted: Nov 11 2008, 12:27 PM
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QUOTE (fuji* @ Today at 12:32 AM)
Lol. That's true, but remember, how would our racing gene's go any further in our life time without a girl by your side? I wish i had a nice girlfriend =_=.

If you're doing it right, she's in the car directly next to you or slightly behind you. If you're doing it wrong, she's ahead, or sitting at home pouting about you spending time with your car.

I've tried to keep my interest limited to girls inside (or close to) the local car community, so that I can be sure that my car won't get neglected down the road. I'd honestly like a gf right now, but I'd also like to move back out of my parents' house first. :Xl:
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RB33
Posted: Nov 13 2008, 07:55 AM
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QUOTE (cmspaz @ Nov 11 2008, 12:27 PM)
If you're doing it right, she's in the car directly next to you or slightly behind you. If you're doing it wrong, she's ahead, or sitting at home pouting about you spending time with your car.

I've tried to keep my interest limited to girls inside (or close to) the local car community, so that I can be sure that my car won't get neglected down the road. I'd honestly like a gf right now, but I'd also like to move back out of my parents' house first. :Xl:

That's a very good idea... Like it or not, sometimes parents get in the way of your decisions, thinking that they know what's best for you... even if it not anymore... :ph34r2:
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cmspaz
Posted: Nov 13 2008, 09:51 AM
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Yeah, I moved back in after I failed out of engineering at Iowa State and my then gf broke up with me and told me not to move in to the apartment we were leasing together. I said okay and moved back with my parents.

There are a lot of things that need to happen before I move out, and a job is one of them. It sucks trying to find one these days, though, the way things are going for businesses.
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fuji*
Posted: Nov 14 2008, 12:14 AM
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QUOTE (cmspaz @ Yesterday at 10:51 AM)
Yeah, I moved back in after I failed out of engineering at Iowa State and my then gf broke up with me and told me not to move in to the apartment we were leasing together. I said okay and moved back with my parents.

There are a lot of things that need to happen before I move out, and a job is one of them. It sucks trying to find one these days, though, the way things are going for businesses.

Ya.. it sucks when things like that happen to you. But stll, i wanna have the best college life i can get and hopefully, i can share that with a gf.. if i ever have one XD. Crap.. im depressing myself again. lol.

It's kind of funny now that i think about it. Im always good at anything BUT girls. I can never talk to them in the right now nor think about what to talk about when im around them. I hate myself for being non-talkative around girls. Im not very opened either. =_=. Mayb i'll audtion for the next 40-year old virgin movie. LMFAO
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DOHC
Posted: Nov 14 2008, 12:28 AM
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Parents tend to"cock block" and it is very annoying so are the friends of a GF
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fuji*
Posted: Nov 14 2008, 12:42 AM
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QUOTE (DOHC @ Today at 1:28 AM)
Parents tend to"cock block" and it is very annoying so are the friends of a GF

Lol i kno how that feels. I brought my friend to my room ( a girl) to look at some old year books we were in back in middle school. We stayed in my room quiet awhile and my parents thought we were up to something. Sure they trust me with 1 or 2 girls but 1 girl? Come on =_=
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RB33
Posted: Nov 14 2008, 08:12 AM
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QUOTE (fuji* @ Today at 12:42 AM)
Lol i kno how that feels. I brought my friend to my room ( a girl) to look at some old year books we were in back in middle school. We stayed in my room quiet awhile and my parents thought we were up to something. Sure they trust me with 1 or 2 girls but 1 girl? Come on =_=

Now that's rather odd... <_<
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Yoshida Seiji
Posted: Nov 14 2008, 10:28 AM
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My parents gave up with me and girls. :lol: I was a man-whore when I was youngers and brought girls home all the time.
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fuji*
Posted: Nov 14 2008, 01:02 PM
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QUOTE (Yoshida Seiji @ Today at 11:28 AM)
My parents gave up with me and girls. :lol: I was a man-whore when I was youngers and brought girls home all the time.

Lmfao. I kno i kno. That's practically the same with me. Most of my friends are girls. THe guy/girl ratio for my friends is 40/60.
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Theory
Posted: Nov 15 2008, 09:32 PM
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ROFLMAO.

Wow...
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RB33
Posted: Nov 16 2008, 12:48 AM
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QUOTE (fuji* @ Nov 14 2008, 01:02 PM)
Lmfao. I kno i kno. That's practically the same with me. Most of my friends are girls. THe guy/girl ratio for my friends is 40/60.

You lucky bastard :P
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